Raising a confident child
As a child and being the youngest one in the family I have always been treated as “under the shell” kid. I always wanted to break this chain. God has gifted me with two of my adorable darlings. I believe that “with every child there’s a birth of mother too!” but inside my heart I had my own set of apprehensions as well. As a mother, I was ready to explore and experiment a totally new world, as I have always believed that “one can only learn from mistakes”.
Being in nuclear family enhances the set of anxieties and rigidness in the transformation into new Mum. For me It was a challenge from the day one as I happily kicked off my six figure salary to efficiently and effectively raise my children. I have realized the importance of a healthy and open atmosphere for my children, which is slightly difficult to achieve in nuclear families, which have comparatively less support and most of the responsibilities have to be handled by me.
The first thing which I wanted to inculcate in my child was “the power to think in the right direction” and “Independent and Confident behavior”. I follow the practice of “listening patiently” and “understanding their needs”. I feel that the most powerful tool to establish a quality relationship with a child is to spend time with him/her and during a conversation try putting yourself into their shoes. I always make it as a part of conversation – if you do this then you may face this, so do you still want to go ahead? Do you really think you will be able to manage it? And what If you don’t succeed? I appreciate their answers and I have stood by them to respect their decisions.
Here are few ideas that I follow which might be helpful for your little one to face this world with spark!
- Encourage/Appreciate – Appreciate your child for even tiniest of good work.
- Express Yourself – Encourage them to be expressive irrespective of the fear of being wrong! Involve them in games wherein they can express themselves. Listen to them patiently and give your best to understand them.
- Let them handle minor tiffs – Listen to them and suggest the possible way out but don’t force your ideas on them. Let your child take a call as an individual and let him/her handle any small fights or miscommunication among friends. You may intervene when you feel it has reached a point where the children cannot handle it.
- Concept of Earning – let them earn their toys/games or anything which is at the top of their list e.g. by being disciplined can really help them in earning a new toy of their choice as a token of appreciation from their parents. In this way, they will also learn to value their toys.
- Learn To Say NO To Your Child – help your child in understanding what is right or wrong for them. Don’t let their demands overpass you. They should learn to accept NO for an answer.
- Involve your Child in Physical activities – Playing any good sport can really help your child to develop team building and social skills. Also, it will help to keep them away from computers and mobile games.
- Exposure/Role Models – Provide your child exposure to arts/dance/craft/drawing/Music/sports and so on. Let them choose what they want to do. Not every child is good in numbers or for example in dance. Support their strengths and help them out in overcome their weaknesses. Remember, when they say “yes” or “no” for anything, there has to be some logic behind it. Share motivational stories and ask them about their role models.
- Encourage them to Stay healthy – Educate them with the concept of staying physically fit and encourage them to achieve the same. Make them aware about unhealthy lifestyle, junk food, hygiene and cleanliness.